This is the fifth or sixth iteration of my blog. If reading that sentence didn't give you a sense of my doubt and desperation in making this one finally stick, I assure you that the feelings are there.

As a socially anxious creative person haunted by both a compulsive desire to express myself and an irrational fear of being ridiculed by others (specifically acquaintances, otherwise known as nominal friends, who are the scariest breed of imaginary critics in my head) for the quality of my expression, I've seen to the birth and premature death of one too many passion projects.

Case in point: my past, mostly short-lived blogging endeavours each experienced a similar pattern of a season of excited creativity that was soon followed by the nervous thought that anyone, including people who intimidated me in real life, could see and judge my work. Burdened with the weight of vulnerability, I would subsequently tear down whatever much or little that I had built.

Like virtually any writer, I cringe when I look at my past work. But unlike a successful one, I keep erasing the past, leaving me with nothing to show for it but a sense of imposter syndrome. This time will be different. At least I hope so.

The idea of having a blog again after more than a year of hiatus is terrifying. This time is made all the more overwhelming by the notion that my website would also be a place to document my artwork, so that I'm now no longer just putting myself out there as a writer but as an artist too.

Terrifying as it is, I must do it because, just as a citizen of the physical world needs a place she can call home, I, as one of the many citizens of the increasingly real and ubiquitous virtual world, crave a corner of the internet I can call my own. And no, a social media account won't do because a space whose features and continued existence are under the mercy of the powers that be's whims and fancies is not something I can ever truly claim as mine.

My online home must be a property that I own and can be assured will exist for as long as I make it, whose design I have full control of and in which I can put whatever I wish. For these reasons, this website exists. This time, I will fight the compulsion to wipe the slate clean the moment I feel vulnerable. Hopefully, this will be the final time I write a "first post" for my blog.

The purpose of this site, Stars May Speak, is to be a storehouse for my art, writing and any other projects that i get my hands on. Ultimately, Stars May Speak is a reminder to myself to be thoughtful, stay curious and realise wonder. I hope I inspire you to do the same.